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Contributing Factors to Global Involvement in World War II

In this argumentative essay, a student discusses the multiple stakeholders involved in World War II and how the war captured unprecedented levels of global attention. The student argues that the media, economic and militaristic mobilization, and different ideologies all influenced the war's scope.
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This essay received a C by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a C by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Angela's feedback:

"You have provided a lot of solid, factual information and a clearly defined thesis statement, but your body paragraphs do not support your thesis. The paper could be improved first by reorganizing your body paragraphs so that they better match the order of the main points you present in your thesis. Then each body paragraph could be fleshed out with a bit more of your personal reasoning and analysis to demonstrate how the evidence you have supplied ties back to the thesis. Finally, a thorough review of your essay to focus on writing conventions (grammar, punctuation, spelling, etc.) would help make your argument easier to understand."

Learn more about this feedback