In-text citation:
(Kibin, 2024)
Reference list entry:
Kibin. (2024). The economics of america's death penalty. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-economics-of-americas-death-penalty-B3j5Zby5
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Bridget's feedback:
"This is off to a good start, and the wide-ranging yet focused discussion shows the depth of your research into this topic. As you move forward, focus on presentation and organization. Let's quickly workshop the opening with the aim of tightening up the presentation and ensuring structure and organization facilitate the discussion. First, you present a number of very good points in the first paragraph; the observation about the regions is particularly striking. At the moment, however, the paragraph has a jumbled quality as it struggles to contain several different groups of information without much transition (some history, the point about the states/regions, origin of the word, methods of execution). I propose cutting this catch-all opening paragraph and integrating the various specific points into the body of the paper as you go.
Other recommendations include fusing the second and third paragraph into a more succinct overview in order to get the reader to the discussion of cost faster. I also recommend targeted revisions at the sentence level with a similar aim of movement and efficiency. Your writing has good flow and shows style and control, so this can be a great way to exercise those qualities further. To provide one example, consider this revision from the conclusion that collapses two sentences down into one: The public tends to view execution as a deterrent to crime; whether or not it is, politicians use the death penalty as a symbolic stance for being tough on crime."
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In-text citation:
(Kibin, 2024)
Reference list entry:
Kibin. (2024). The economics of america's death penalty. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-economics-of-americas-death-penalty-B3j5Zby5
In-text citation:
("The Economics of America's Death Penalty.")
Works Cited entry:
"The Economics of America's Death Penalty." Kibin, 2024, www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-economics-of-americas-death-penalty-B3j5Zby5
Footnote:
1. "The Economics of America's Death Penalty." Kibin, 2024. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-economics-of-americas-death-penalty-B3j5Zby5.
Bibliography entry:
"The Economics of America's Death Penalty." Kibin, 2024. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-economics-of-americas-death-penalty-B3j5Zby5.
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