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How Team Players Facilitate Effective Teamwork

In this essay, the student describes the qualities of a team player, whether that individual is in a leadership position or as part of an equal partnership. The student gives examples of team players in the military, sports, the workplace, and within families.
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3
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837
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

team player
Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Bridget's feedback:

"You've crafted a focused piece of writing with solid content and sound organization. The generalized nature of much of the discussion, however, leaves a lot of space for the reader's attention to wander. Have you considered distributing your specific examples (para. 5) across the thematic body paragraphs? This will give the reader something to hold onto, working as mnemonics and signposts for the broader discussion about characteristics and qualities. A similar effect can be crafted by incorporating reference to research and outside sources, bringing interest and credibility to the discussion and claims. Finally, emphasizing what a team player doesn't do in the introduction and conclusion doesn't quite match up with the body paragraphs' positive focus: more consistency of approach will help the reader's comprehension. Based on the focus of the body paragraphs, I recommend a cordoned-off moment where you describe what to avoid, rather than incorporating this into the essay's very structure."

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