In-text citation:
(Kibin, 2024)
Reference list entry:
Kibin. (2024). Using the bible to date the pyramids. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/using-the-bible-to-date-the-pyramids-nl3oJJMf
More essays like this:
This preview is partially blurred. Sign up to view the complete essay.
More essays like this:
View other essays like this one:
Bridget's feedback:
"Because you lay out the purpose and literalist framework from the beginning, this essay is able to stand more steadily than would otherwise be the case; how successfully you argue this point is going to depend on who your audience is, so do make sure you have carefully defined this and that it informs your approach. I spot further opportunities, however, to create a sturdier sentence beyond "Since everything...has been proven true...": consider a parenthetical citation that guides the reader to a few major sources that establish this position.
Within the argumentative framework, your discussion proceeds clearly. I wonder at the tension between introducing the Bible as a source and then describing the discussion as your "opinion" (para. 1); again, make sure you have clearly defined your purpose and approach as part of your rhetorical project, and make sure all diction follows accordingly. Can description of Biblical events really be "opinion" in a literalist essay?
As for lower-order concerns, watch out in particular for dangling modifiers. To zoom in on one example, let's look at the first sentence of para. 2, which states that God made the first human "by taking the facts and records found in the Bible and doing a little math." The reader eventually puzzles out that this clause does not refer to God, but because the syntax technically says this, the reader is forced to hit pause and decipher, ultimately distracting them from the discussion. A similar issue is again present at the start of para. 3.
Finally, clarify who this scientist is in your first sentence; such an eccentric claim should certainly be attributed lest it bleed onto your own authorial ethos, already occupying a very specific position."
Learn more about this feedback
In-text citation:
(Kibin, 2024)
Reference list entry:
Kibin. (2024). Using the bible to date the pyramids. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/using-the-bible-to-date-the-pyramids-nl3oJJMf
In-text citation:
("Using the Bible to Date the Pyramids.")
Works Cited entry:
"Using the Bible to Date the Pyramids." Kibin, 2024, www.kibin.com/essay-examples/using-the-bible-to-date-the-pyramids-nl3oJJMf
Footnote:
1. "Using the Bible to Date the Pyramids." Kibin, 2024. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/using-the-bible-to-date-the-pyramids-nl3oJJMf.
Bibliography entry:
"Using the Bible to Date the Pyramids." Kibin, 2024. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/using-the-bible-to-date-the-pyramids-nl3oJJMf.
You know how looking at a math problem similar to the one you're stuck on can help you get unstuck? Reading example essays works the same way!
Here are some ways our essay examples library can help you with your assignment:
Read our Academic Honor Code for more information on how to use (and how not to use) our library.
Essays may be lightly modified for readability or to protect the anonymity of contributors, but we do not edit essay examples prior to publication. (And nope, we don't source our examples from our editing service! Check out our Privacy and Content Sharing policies for more information.)
The essays in our library are intended to serve as content examples to inspire you as you write your own essay. They're not intended to be submitted as your own work, so we don't waste time removing every error. This allows our team to focus on improving the library and adding new essays.
The example essays in Kibin's library were written by real students for real classes. To protect the anonymity of contributors, we've removed their names and personal information from the essays. When citing an essay from our library, you can use "Kibin" as the author.
Kibin does not guarantee the accuracy, timeliness, or completeness of the essays in the library; essay content should not be construed as advice. For more information on choosing credible sources for your paper, check out this blog post.
Did you find something inaccurate, misleading, abusive, or otherwise problematic in this essay example? Let us know! We'll take a look right away.