The Reproductive Rights of the Developmentally Disabled in Regards to Involuntary Sterilization

This essay is about the issue of sterilizing developmentally disabled or mentally disabled people. The practice was supported by the belief that these people would produce mentally disabled children and/or not be able to care for their children. In the early 20th century, these people were primarily sent to poorly run state institutions where patients were over-medicated and sometimes abused. In addition, mentally disabled women were viewed as sexually promiscuous, so they were put in institutions at the onset of puberty and sometimes released when they reached menopause.

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Jenn's feedback:

"This paper is off to a good start, and with some minor changes, you can significantly improve it. Making a few adjustments to the introduction will have a significant impact on the paper. As written, it is not clear what the goal of your essay is. You do have bits and pieces of a potential thesis statement. The thesis statement should communicate to the reader the purpose of the paper and the points you are going to cover to meet that goal. This thesis statement will also provide you with direction as to how the body of your paper should flow, keeping the writing focused.

You have a lot of good content in your essay, but there is a level of repetition. When there is no repetition, there is often a lack of transition between new ideas. To increase the cohesiveness of the paper, add transitional phrases and sentences when you introduce new concepts. Overall, the piece is neatly formatted. It does appear that you are trying to follow MLA style guidelines, and there are errors in the references. Last, there are some word choice and sentence structure errors throughout the writing. The primary mistake I ran across was not putting a comma after introductory phrases.

Finally, be mindful of your terminology; the term "developmentally disabled" is a preferred term for people with these kinds of disabilities."

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In-text citation:

(Kibin, 2024)

Reference list entry:

Kibin. (2024). The reproductive rights of the developmentally disabled in regards to involuntary sterilization. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-reproductive-rights-of-the-developmentally-disabled-in-regards-to-involuntary-sterilization-wodfnKzz

Be sure to capitalize proper nouns (e.g. Egypt) and titles (e.g. Macbeth) in the essay title portion of your citation.

In-text citation:

("The Reproductive Rights of the Developmentally Disabled in Regards to Involuntary Sterilization.")

Works Cited entry:

"The Reproductive Rights of the Developmentally Disabled in Regards to Involuntary Sterilization." Kibin, 2024, www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-reproductive-rights-of-the-developmentally-disabled-in-regards-to-involuntary-sterilization-wodfnKzz

Footnote:

1. "The Reproductive Rights of the Developmentally Disabled in Regards to Involuntary Sterilization." Kibin, 2024. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-reproductive-rights-of-the-developmentally-disabled-in-regards-to-involuntary-sterilization-wodfnKzz.

Bibliography entry:

"The Reproductive Rights of the Developmentally Disabled in Regards to Involuntary Sterilization." Kibin, 2024. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-reproductive-rights-of-the-developmentally-disabled-in-regards-to-involuntary-sterilization-wodfnKzz.