A Look at the Reasons People Go to College
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"You have made a lot of good points in regards to why people might go to college. You have also neatly formatted your essay making it easier to read. Unfortunately, there are a couple of factors leading to this essay not being easy to comprehend. First, the text does not flow smoothly. There seems to be a disconnect between ideas because of a lack of sufficient transitions between them. Make sure that when you present new ideas you create transitions that relate ideas together. The essay also does not have a well-formed, guiding introduction. Because of this, it is not clear what the goal of your essay is. This confusion is further solidified by the occasional mention of people not needing to go to college to be successful. Because of these comments, it is unclear if the goal of your essay is to explain the benefits of going to college or to argue that college isn't necessary to be successful. "
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