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Alternate Ending to “Priscilla and the Wimps” by Richard Peck

In this piece of creative writing, a student provides an alternate ending to the short story “Priscilla and the Wimps” by Richard Peck. This ending involves Priscilla Roseberry, Melvin Detweiler, and Monk Klutter.
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Angela's feedback:

"You have put together a strong narrative, and your descriptive language works effectively in pulling the reader into your story. Awkward phrases such as “with earnest” should be recast though to improve the flow of your writing. Run-on sentences such as the one that begins “Monk’s a strong” should also be reworded; an exception should be made for run-on sentences that are being used to characterize how a particular individual speaks. The word “god” should be capitalized when referencing the Christian God and left in lowercase when speaking about other gods. Meanwhile, no apostrophe should be used with the word “gonna” because no letters have been omitted (unlike, for example, “goin’” where the second “g” is missing)."

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