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How Pride Drives Beowulf into Conflict and Victory

In this essay on Beowulf, the student takes a look at pride. The student notes that Beowulf's strength and accomplishments often manifest as ostentatious displays. The student argues that Beowulf eventually learns to take responsibility for others and realizes his mortality, though this doesn't necessarily diminish his self-regard.
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

protagonist
Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

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Bridget's feedback:

"You are off to a good start, and this current draft has a purposeful organization, structure, and logical movement through the discussion. The argumentation, or the thesis, feels just about there, though a few questions remain. First, you trace an aspect of development ("After he realized...") but also note it doesn't necessarily change how Beowulf acts ("...he still was..."). What are your thoughts on this? Does this illuminate a message, theme, or similar beyond the surface of the text? What does the poem want to tell us about heroes, pride, and boastfulness?

My other comments are largely regarding lower-order concerns, which occasionally impact clarity. For example, what do you mean in the second sentence ("is usually explained by...")? This looks like a revision task to clarify or make more precise the expressed idea, so keep in mind your reader's comprehension and ability to follow the discussion as you review your choices in the writing."

Learn more about this feedback