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Word Count: 817
Bring the Noise The little piss-ant children outside sound like a thousand screaming banshees A car door slammed outside my window a moment ago I swear an H-bomb went off at that moment My friends inquire from time to time why I drink so much I never know what to say I begin to take inventory of my body parts as part of a pseudo checklist I say pseudo because I dont really care whats missing My mouth feels like I have furry wet slipper shoved in it until I realize that its my tongue My head feels as thought I just had a full frontal lobotomy without the benefit of anesthesia Sometimes the pain subsides just long enough for me to slip into reality only to have it snatched away again My memory is recovered in the same fashion The light is rendering my eyes useless despite the fact I have not opened them yet I try to shift my eyes to avoid the suns harsh light only to find that the cloud of dust that choked the life out of this planet 180 billion years ago has settled beneath my eyelids I dont remember going to sleep Did I sleep It seems I took my self-medication regime a bit to far last night Why do people drink this much There are all manner of ways to put off hangovers or lessen the blow of them Believe me I have tired them all everything from drinking a glass of water for every drink I took to massive doses of vitamin C the following morning Even the over-the-counter market has pursued a solution to the morning after blues Alka-Seltzer released its Morning Relief medication aimed at undoing the previous nights excess of fun about a year ago with much rejoice from some college students I heard about it from a friend of mine in Galveston who swears by the stuff Dude he says
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