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An Informative Essay on The Dangers of Unhealthy Eating

In this essay, a student describes the importance of a healthy diet within a healthy lifestyle. The writer also reflects on their previous knowledge on the subject of healthy eating and how that knowledge changed through the process of writing the essay.
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Amanda's feedback:

"I thought you included a lot of interesting and important information here, and it flows well from paragraph to paragraph. I docked quite a few points because your introduction and first conclusion seemed completely unrelated to the rest of the document. These may be included because of an assignment, but they don't flow well enough into the rest of the text for the reader to understand why they're there. Another thing that hurt the grade was the lack of a clear thesis for this essay. Obviously it's about the many different dangers of poor eating, but typically you want a guiding statement or thesis that tells your reader what you're going to discuss. The other two issues that cost some points were style issues with MLA and some grammar/punctuation issues that are minor but that would get you work marked down in the classroom."

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