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Career Exploration for the Neonatal Nurse Occupation

In this informative essay, a student explores different aspects of the neonatal nurse occupation. The student looks at the ideal qualities of a neonatal nurse, future predictions for job demand, projected salary, and expected work hours.
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Angela's feedback:

"You completed a thorough exploration of your desired career by considering different aspects of the neonatal nurse position such as the desired characteristics of a neonatal nurse candidate and expected salary. While it's good that you framed the information you found within your personal context by considering how it affects you, if you want to adopt a more academic tone, you should omit personal opinions about whether you like a given piece of information that you've discovered. Your essay could be improved with an edit to address writing convention errors such as your typo of the word "more" as "ore." In addition, there are a number of words that are written in a nonstandard way in your work, including "new born" instead of "newborn" and "my self" instead of "myself." Note as well that standard practice is to not capitalize the term "neonatal nurse" when you're referring to the position, much like you wouldn't capitalize "teacher" or "banker." Finally, end punctuation should be included after a parenthetical citation, so there shouldn't be cases where you're including a period both before and after a citation."

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