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Censorship Is Unacceptable

In this argumentative essay, a student discusses the topic of censorship. The student asserts that censorship should not be allowed because it is important for people to be able to be exposed to all sorts of media and information.
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This essay received a C by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a C by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Angela's feedback:

"Your stance on the topic of censorship comes through, and the basic premise for each of your body paragraphs makes sense. Your first body paragraph would be stronger, though, if you discussed censorship of materials or information in general, not just in terms of viewing something. Since you talk about censorship in journalism and books, freedom to read a variety of materials is important too. Your argument in the third body paragraph needs more development. If you think that parents should spend more time talking to their kids about sensitive topics instead of relying on censorship, then this is a point you should explicitly state for the reader's understanding. Book titles should be italicized, not placed in quotation marks. Run-on sentences should be recast to flesh out your statements and clarify your writing. There are various minor errors such as your use of "however" followed by a semicolon. In terms of formatting, your title should be centered using your software program's centering tool, and a final check should be done to ensure any extra spaces, such as the one between the opening quotation mark and the word "More," are deleted."

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