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How Australia's History Shapes "Australian Identity"

In this paper, the student discusses the concept of an "Australian Identity" and utilizes excerpts from a text to demonstrate this concept and support their argument.
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Natalie's feedback:

"The notion of an “Australian Identity” and how Australia’s history has shaped that identity make for interesting topics. For the most part, you stayed focused and answered the questions presented in the prompt fairly well. Your writing was a bit repetitive at times and the quotes, while supporting your argument, were integrated a bit awkwardly. You did, however, make great use of transition words and phrases, which helped your writing flow more smoothly. On top of this, the formatting of your paper was clear and consistent. I would recommend proofreading very carefully, as there were several grammar, punctuation, and word choice mistakes. For example, you said “the text… splays,” instead of “displays.” There were also a few instances of subject-verb disagreement (like “impressions of the land determines” instead of “impressions… determine”), so watch out for those easy-to-miss errors. Overall, you have a good first draft that outlines the ways Australia’s history has alienated the Aboriginal people from an “Australian Identity.” With some revision, you will have a great paper."

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