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Its hard to watch the news or read the paper without coming across some mention of infidelity either by an elected official or some famous personality Its tough to get a handle on marital affairs but according to recent polls 22 percent of married men have strayed at least once during their married lives and 14 percent of married women have had an affair at some time NA 2002 While it is easy to point the finger of blame at the unfaithful partner some responsibility belongs to the pigeon who turned a blind eye to the situation Perceptual blocks can influence views they can manipulate critical thinking and reasoning processes I am a prime example of this After two years in a committed relationship I was cheated on It was an inconceivable event that shook the very foundation of my belief system I questioned myself profusely- How could this have happened Why didnt I see it coming What did I do to deserve it Personal barriers such as self-concept selective abstraction and denial stood in my way of logically assessing the situation Before the incident my life was seemingly in place I was living in Seattle miles away from home with a great boyfriend and exciting job I was living in a rose-colored fantasy due to self-concept The way that I viewed myself was that I had it all in place I had my perfect friends perfect boyfriend perfect life No one was going to tell me different I thought of myself in relation to my surroundings In example when I was around my friends I thought of myself as the one who entertains I would have company over and spend the evening cooking pouring drinks and telling funny stories I considered this my personality I didnt ever stop to think why I was doing it I just conceded to it I never considered the fact that I didnt have to entertain or that I
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