How PACs Are Turning the U.S. into an Oligarchy

This argumentative essay takes a position against political action committees (PACs). The student argues that PACs allow special interest groups to essentially buy votes, undermining the democratic process.

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Bridget's feedback:

"This essay is off to a good start, and the first paragraphs is a great example of focused and substantiated writing. The second paragraph feels a little less focused, so your next step should apply the tools used in the first paragraph to start refining that second paragraph. Some aspects to consider as you turn your attention to the second part: Can that current long paragraph be split up, creating more focus and movement? Will you be adding a "pros" (positive impact) paragraph or section to attend to the first paragraph's final sentence, or should the paper's thesis and approach be revised as you move into the next draft? For now, focus on higher-order concerns and making sure this draft is complete. A little later, lower-order concerns, like cleaning up some awkward diction ("upon" in the first sentence), can be addressed to move into a final draft."

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In-text citation:

(Kibin, 2025)

Reference list entry:

Kibin. (2025). How pacs are turning the u.s. into an oligarchy. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/how-pacs-are-turning-the-us-into-an-oligarchy-daIAkxzW

Be sure to capitalize proper nouns (e.g. Egypt) and titles (e.g. Macbeth) in the essay title portion of your citation.

In-text citation:

("How PACs Are Turning the U.S. into an Oligarchy.")

Works Cited entry:

"How PACs Are Turning the U.S. into an Oligarchy." Kibin, 2025, www.kibin.com/essay-examples/how-pacs-are-turning-the-us-into-an-oligarchy-daIAkxzW

Footnote:

1. "How PACs Are Turning the U.S. into an Oligarchy." Kibin, 2025. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/how-pacs-are-turning-the-us-into-an-oligarchy-daIAkxzW.

Bibliography entry:

"How PACs Are Turning the U.S. into an Oligarchy." Kibin, 2025. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/how-pacs-are-turning-the-us-into-an-oligarchy-daIAkxzW.