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Power Should Be Used to Ensure Justice for Everyone

In this reflective essay, a student shares a childhood experience she observed involving the abuse of power. The student then discusses why it’s important to continue working towards a world where power is used to ensure just treatment for everyone.
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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a B by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Angela's feedback:

"You express your thoughts on the topic of power and justice well, but some awkward phrases remain (e.g., “In my primary” and “to provide them has”). Keep in mind that with dialogue, a new paragraph should be started whenever there’s a new speaker. The word “dad” should be capitalized when it’s being used in place of someone’s name and kept in lowercase when it’s referring to the generic familial position (e.g., “Dad told me” vs. “my dad told me”). The statement that begins “Injustice is common” is an example of a run-on sentence that should be recast to improve the flow of your writing. A final review is recommended to ensure that exactly one space appears between words and between sentences."

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