The Effect of the Internet on Violent Behavior

This essay discusses the effect of internet content on violent behavior.

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Jim's feedback:

"You should think carefully about what you say. For example, you cite the “common knowledge to hear …,” but the word "knowledge" is unnecessary. The internet may affect people, but it does not impose anything on them. What is “succession of the media?” If you look up the definition, "succession" is not the word you want. We do not refer to media “contents,” but rather it is “content.” You then refer to “millions of contents.” This implies that a “content” is a countable thing, but it is not. Consider these examples, and make an effort to write with more precision.

You mention “the Pew Research Center survey.” This implies there is only one survey, but they do many surveys, so this is “a survey,” and not “the survey.” You mismatch subject and verb when you say “content … are safe.” Note also that you should not capitalize “community,” as it is not a proper noun.

You can improve your writing in two ways: 1) Always run a grammar check. This will identify issues that you can correct and learn from; 2) Read through your work multiple times, looking for ways to improve your writing. You have good thoughts to share, and this will help you to express them more clearly."

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In-text citation:

(Kibin, 2023)

Reference list entry:

Kibin. (2023). The effect of the internet on violent behavior. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-effect-of-the-internet-on-violent-behavior-AbbnVbVc

Be sure to capitalize proper nouns (e.g. Egypt) and titles (e.g. Macbeth) in the essay title portion of your citation.

In-text citation:

("The Effect of the Internet on Violent Behavior.")

Works Cited entry:

"The Effect of the Internet on Violent Behavior." Kibin, 2023, www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-effect-of-the-internet-on-violent-behavior-AbbnVbVc

Footnote:

1. "The Effect of the Internet on Violent Behavior." Kibin, 2023. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-effect-of-the-internet-on-violent-behavior-AbbnVbVc.

Bibliography entry:

"The Effect of the Internet on Violent Behavior." Kibin, 2023. http://www.kibin.com/essay-examples/the-effect-of-the-internet-on-violent-behavior-AbbnVbVc.