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The Importance of Maintaining a Balanced Lifestyle

In this argumentative essay, a student discusses the importance of maintaining a balanced lifestyle beyond dietary considerations. The student explains why people should also practice moderation in their physical activities and socializing.
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This essay received a C by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a C by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Angela's feedback:

"You make valid points about the importance of maintaining a balanced lifestyle with regard to one’s diet, physical activities, and socializing. However, your reasoning would be more convincing if you expanded your body paragraphs by providing more examples to illustrate your supporting points. In terms of writing convention errors, phrases such as “may end injured” and “the one have for yourself” are especially awkward and should be recast for clarity. Your semicolon use needs to be rechecked too; sometimes you use the semicolon correctly, and other times you don’t. You should also decide whether you prefer British or American English. At the moment, you use a mix of both with the appearance of words such as “socialising” and “favorable.”"

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