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The STEM Gender Gap in the United States

In this argumentative essay, a student discusses the gender gap in STEM (science, technology, engineering, and mathematics) subjects. The student asserts that more still needs to be done to get women involved and keep women employed in STEM fields.
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This essay received an A by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received an A by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Angela's feedback:

"You put together a very strong essay on the STEM gender gap and provide a convincing argument for more work to be done in the interest of gender equality. There are a number of minor edits that can be made to further strengthen the quality of your work. For example, to avoid sounding repetitive, it would be a good idea to recast any sentences where you repeat words such as "begin" multiple times: "in the beginning but begins to fall apart beginning into." In addition, words such as "brain drain" and "proven" don't need to be included in quotation marks. While introducing a term such as "leaks" in quotation marks is acceptable, though not necessary, once you've signaled to the reader your specialized use of the term, the quotes are no longer needed. You also have a slight tendency to overuse the comma, which can be distracting when its inclusion isn't essential to provide clarity in a statement. In terms of formatting, double (2.0) line spacing should be kept consistent within a paragraph and between paragraphs. Keep in mind that typically before using an abbreviation the term it stands for is written out in full just in case a reader is not familiar with it. The abbreviation is then included in parentheses right after the term and is used thereafter. Given the tone of your work, consider eliminating all contractions from your essay."

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