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Why the Novel Lord of the Flies Is Still Relevant Today

In this argumentative essay, the student argues that William Golding's Lord of the Flies is still relevant today. The student cites the dangers of religion and political division in addition to the need for democracy as supporting facts for their argument.
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This essay received a C by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

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This essay received a C by one of Kibin's paper graders. Click here to see what was done well and what needs improvement.

More essays like this:

Not sure what I'd do without @Kibin
- Alfredo Alvarez, student @ Miami University
Exactly what I needed.
- Jenna Kraig, student @ UCLA
Wow. Most helpful essay resource ever!
- Chris Stochs, student @ UC Berkeley

View other essays like this one:

Erin's feedback:

"You have a clear main idea, which is essential for an effective essay. Your body paragraphs do support your thesis, but developing those body paragraphs further will certainly make your essay stronger. For example, what specifically about the divide over Trump has led to violence? Something else you could do this is to cite more recent examples. For instance, you talk about the need for democracy, but you use Hitler's rise during WWII as an example. Since you're arguing that the book is relevant today, choosing a more current example of a threat to democracy would help to better show the novel's current relevance. In terms of organization, your essay progresses logically, but your transitions are a little basic. There are also several grammar and sentence structure issues in your essay; while these don't impact the readability to a significant extent, your writing will be even stronger after a round of proofreading and editing to polish it. Finally, be sure to review the MLA standards to ensure that your formatting is correct; your writing should be double-spaced, and in-text citations referring to the specific pages from the book you're referring to would be even better."

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